My Testimony: "I almost gave up"

(I wrote this to share my testimony, when I was 12 years old I had an experience with God that changed my life forever,and ever since I have never been the same. This is my story in the form of a poem. I hope it brings life into someones dark place,and hope into even the most hopeless of situations. He did it for me,will He not do it for you? All you have to do is ask.)

I almost gave up

I almost gave in

Let go of the master

Fear my only friend.

I dreamed of denial,

Rejecting His peace.

Barely living, survival decreased.

I questioned the answers

I forgot the truth.

Searching for old mans wisdom,

in distractions of youth.

I ate misconceptions

and created my own.

Not sure if Id ever draw near to His throne.

Not sure if His love could build me a home.

I lost myself aching in pain and in strife

at a loss for the hope that would bring me to life.

I came to the end of my tattered up rope

I felt only numbness,with no strength to cope.

My eyes dully lifted,a prayer I would pray changed my life forever on that fateful Day

I prayed:

"God can you save me,are you even there. I cant even see you through this dark despair. I cant take the burden I cant fight this fight. Im not strong enough and i don't feel your light. Help me please help,cause if your not real. I don't want to keep living,there is nothing to feel."

I gave ultimatums, I gave Him a choice:

"Show me that your real God, Let me hear your voice. For if I'm mistaken and you are not there,Im giving up life, giving into despair.

Shortly after I prayed, I found myself in a room. Full of other believers certain of coming doom.

Then, All of a sudden. I lost sense of time. My clearest vision was clouded and blind. Tears flowed from my eyes,like a fountain had broke.

I felt your presence, and you presence it spoke...

You said:

"Ive never left you, I never will leave,since you were a child Ive been there with thee.

I love you my daughter,I am your true friend,my desire is for you. This never will end"

I felt his words spoken as much as Id heard.

My heart set a flutter at the sound of His words.

My soul filled with gladness erasing my pain,all that I'd thought lost, was suddenly gained.

I knew from that moment I'd never be the same.

no matter what others would say.

No argument used would chase Him away.

"He's real" I could feel Him, "He's real "my heart cried.

"He's so real its crazy," I opened my eyes.

I couldn't be silent,I couldn't sit down.

for "once I was lost but, know Ive been found"

Hallelujah,forever

Hallelujah, my friend

Hallelujah, Dear Jesus

I'll love you,till the end,

(Romans 3:23)

For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God;

(1 John 9-15 )

9 In this was manifested the love of God toward us, because that God sent his only begotten Son into the world, that we might live through him.

10 Herein is love, not that we loved God, but that he loved us, and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins.

(1 John 4:18-19) 18 There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love.

19 We love him, because he first loved us.